Should I of Shouldn't I

Today,
I just felt that i gain freedom for a moment,
yet when kuih manis approach,
i was like
"What shall i do??"
"Anyone pls drag me away"
i felt so stress out during this moments,
later..
she came again,
this time she being offensive,
i am like " What the hell is wrong with you"
"didn't your hear me saying the word busy"
Why must she grab my arms..
making it look that i am the one taking advantage,
the more you try to make things up..
you tend to stir it even harder..
The moment you made that move,
I have concluded with you making me feel so disgusted with myself..